Mothers Day love

First off...a shout out to my own fab mama.  You are brill.  You are so kind, good hearted, Christ like, giving, charitable, unjudgemental, & beautiful inside and out.  You are a truly lovely being.

I just have to take a moment and say just how thankful I am for my children.  For the gift of motherhood.  To be a wife.  To be a woman.  To be a friend.  I am amazed at the way motherhood changes me.  The way it challenges me, makes me realize my many many weaknesses, and just how hard they are to overcome.  But more and more as my littlies become bigger and bigger I am sad.  It's a harsh realization of just how fast they grow. They thrive. They become.  Become who they always were, who they were always meant to be.  Hopefully I don't throw them too far off of that very sacred path.  I am trying so hard to cherish each present moment.  To be aware of what's really important.  Like time. Real time.  Cuddle time.  Eye contact time.  Nap time.  :)  Unfortunately this is something I really have to work on.  

When I had 3 kids, all 3 and under I remember feeling so so so overwhelmed so much of the time. It almost felt like I was drowning.  Drowning in diapers, and doing, and never stopping...then doing some more.  Then entertaining, and dressing, and feeding, and cleaning. Somehow I survived that and yet I'm sad that I "survived it".  That I didn't relish in it more.That I didn't enjoy their cuteness more,  cuddle a little longer before throwing them in bed by 8 pm no matter what!  I feel thankful that I have realized this now while I still have small ones that I can kiss and cuddle and sill guide.  Now the trick is to remember...and who am I kidding, most likely I'll write this very paragraph again next year.  

Having done all of this rambling, my mothers day was good.  Very good.  I woke up to the smell of bacon (a luxury here).  And then little feet coming up the stairs.  Soon 4 littlies on my bed.  And T hugging me and saying "I like you Mom".  I like him too.  Very much.  I attempted to eat the breakfast my hunk of love made me, I had much help.  Then some presents that Jazz so kindly purchased for them to give me.  Mads made me a calendar she made at school, and a card that was to die for.  At church I sat through the entire meeting.  That used to never ever ever happen.  The kids sang for the congregation-we were all the way in the back so T booked it to the stand, then back as fast as his little legs could carry him, it was hilarious.  Jay went with out crying, and Maddie was sweet Maddie.  I just feel....blessed.  So so blessed.  I don't deserve all of the blessings that I have been given.  

Every mothers day I ache for those who want to have children but can't, or don't have the opportunity.  To you I want to say thank you.  Thank you for mothering my children, thank you to those women who have participated in mothering me.  You know who you are.  :)  I am grateful everyday for those women who help in this enormous job of mothering children.  

And thank you mom for continuing to mother me.  I need it.  :)